Redeeming Relationship with Family

The score was 2-1 for Team Blue. I was playing for Team Red. A team mate was having the ball, maintaining possession. He couldn't make up his mind who to pass the ball to, everyone in Team Red were tightly marked. One of us broke free, and as he was trying to signal for a pass, out of nowhere, the ball was stolen from the person on the ball. Everyone in our team knew we had to track back. It would be harder to catch up should they bang in another goal. We had to get back to defence fast, or chances to bounce back into the game would be minimal.

The second session by Annette Arulrajah dealt with family relationships. Bible Verses were mainly from 2 Samuel 18. The verses give the account of the relationship between David (father) and Absalom (son).

A family unit is important to a person's development. We receive nurturing, care and love from our family members. Our very first interaction with people starts at home. Basically, everything in life that we face later on when we leave our home to face the big, big world, we learn from under a roof that shelters our parents, our siblings and even our relatives.

We were heavily dependent on our parents and older siblings when we were young. A family leaves huge imprints on our lives. When we grow more mature, it is our time to give back to the family. Our family units need imprints of us. We must not forsake our duty to our families.

What imprints have your family leave on you? There are positive and negatives sides to family imprints, it's all part and parcel of humanity: no one's perfect. Broken and shattered pieces can be ignored, but like a pair of torn pants, the hole grows bigger if not sewn back together.

From 2 Samuel 18, we learn about David's relationship with his family. He had a lot of wives and children. All demanded attention from him, and every one of them should receive equal attention from him. David was, however, another dweller of this world. He had 24 hours a day, and as a king, he had more time taken away from spending time with all his wives and children. Bit by bit, he couldn't help but become uninvolved with his family matters.

Then it happened. Amnon raped Tamar. David was furious, but did not move a hand against his son Amnon for the despicable act. Absalom, noticing his father's inaction, decided he must take the matter into his own hands. He decided the penalty to the act was death. So he plotted a plan to murder Amnon. Amnon was killed by his brother, Absalom, for raping his sister, Tamar. Once again, David was furious, but did not move a hand against Absalom for the despicable act.

What we see here is the epitome of an inefficient leader of a household who refuses to deal with a situation, even when the call for his intervention is dire. What is so important about the message is that grieviences and arguments that have taken place, cannot be ignored. God convicts us to act when there is brokenness. It is His intention that we must act when the situation requires. God can put back the broken pieces together, through us! Miracles only happen when we allow God to use us to put back the broken pieces together. Read Psalm 103.

A quote by Charles Dickens: Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts. Forgiveness occurs over and over again. Do not be demoralised when we can't seem to forget a hurt a loved one inflicted on us. Forgiveness occurs over and over again because we never really forget. It is never too late. Sometimes, we must move back to go forward. We have to look back into the past, so we can deal with a hurt that is still haunting us. Going back, looking back does not mean we're receding. Sometimes, we move a step back, so we can move two or three or a hundred steps forward.

- TR